Author: frandeebee

Year of the Monkey!!

Happy Lunar New Year friends! We could think of no better way to celebrate the coming of this, the most glorious year of the Fire Monkey than with a list of our favourite on screen monkeys (in no particular order)! Enjoy!

Caesar in Rise of the Planet of the Apes (2011) and Dawn of the Planet of the Apes (2014)

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Hail Caesar! This special orphaned lab chimp who goes from James Francos primitive monkey BFF to leader of the monkey revolution responsible for the downfall of humanity is hands down the most glorious of all on screen Monkeys. Without doubt. Motion captured by Andy Sirkis and CGI rendered by the wizards of WETA, Caesar is one impressively realistic computer generated primate! From his mastery of the English language to his electrocution of a sniveling Draco (in muggle form), Caesars on screen triumphs in both Planet of the Apes reboots are nothing short of glorious.

King Louie in the Jungle Book (1967)

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The Tony Soprano of animated primates, King Louie is one connected orangutan. Leading a gang of jungle monkeys who round up big bear Baloo and his human pet Mowgli to learn the secret of fire, King Louie knows both how to have a good boogie and to make you an offer you simply cannot refuse!

The Flying Monkeys in the Wizard of Oz (1939)

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The Wicked Witch of the West’s army of winged monkeys have to be amongst the scariest chimps ever captured on film. Their ear piercing war shriek is enough to make the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, but combined with their blue fur and the fact that they have wings makes them literally our worst nightmare. From nabbing Toto to un-stuffing the Scarecrow, these monkeys have zero remorse and a murderous penchant for violence that will have you wishing you had your own army of flying primates to terrorise neighbourhood children with while screaming “Fly my pretties, flyyyyy!!”

King Kong (1933) and King Kong (2005)

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Kong. The original and the best. The Grandaddy and undisputed King of all movie monkeys. Complete with an entourage of swirling airplanes Kong will forever endure as one of cinemas greatest monsters. Both a lover and a fighter… Kong is gentle at heart, but more than willing to crack a few skulls if his loved ones are put at risk. Really, he’s just a pretty misunderstood guy and probably could have gotten along with humans initially, but after the way they treated him, there’s no way he would turn down the chance to destroy them all in favor of an apes-rule-all society. If only he had the chance.

Abu from Aladdin (1992)

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Whilst the pet of choice for the homeless gent is usually a three-legged dog or a pigeon of some description, Aladdin has taken the smarter path and gone with the far superior choice of monkey pal Abu. Pilfering from local stall holders is all in a days work for this primate while his master flounces around in a pair of early 90s style parachute pants, singing and generally making a nuisance of himself. Sporting an impressive vest and fez combo Abu might almost make you wish you had your own snazzy monkey confidante to steal apples for you, as long as you’re ok with it having a serious attitude problem and dont mind him making fun of you behind your back it could be a match made in monkey heaven.

The Barrel of Monkeys from Toy Story (1990 – )

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Though their time on screen is brief, the monkeys appearances in Toy Story remain as some of the most memorable moments from the franchise. Who could forget Bo Peep, strung up as a prisoner of the evil Dr Pork Chop, staring down the threat of “death by monkeys”. Truly a horrifying concept.

So there you have it friends! In case this list has got you wondering what this glorious year of the Monkey holds for you we strongly urge to check out Lee Lin Chin’s Lunar New Year Zodiac to kick your year off in style!

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Ye Be Warned Wednesday : Jupiter Ascending

If you knew anything about me you’d know that “big budget sci fi” and “Sean Bean” are two things that are guaranteed to draw me to ANY movie. A combination of the two in Jupiter Ascending just seemed too good to be true – and you know what? It was.

Jupiter Ascending is essentially a splicing together of various other SUPERIOR sci fi themes and ideas with an unnecessary love story thrown in for good measure. For me the most annoying and blazingly obvious examples of stolen intellectual property include (but are not limited to); the presence of an intergalactic beaurocracy (thank you Douglas Adams), the harvesting of humans for nefarious purposes (thank you EVERYONE) and the replica baddies, like this guy….
 

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Spot the difference.

What they have created here with Jupiter Ascending is essentially an intergalactic fairytale between Mila Kunis (who sports various hand me downs from Queen Amidalas wardrobe for the majority of the film) and Channing “Pube Face” Tatum. Why do that?  Why take something perfectly awesome like science fiction and Disney Princess-ify it? It’s as if  the creators thought women wouldn’t be able to appreciate science fiction without a shit load of unnecessary sap laid on!  Give us a break guys!

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Spew.

This movie looks as though it was made for the purposes of winning the most awards for special effects and costume design (which admittedly are impressive) but the story itself left a lot too be desired.
Truth be told I mentally tuned out a little way in (thanks to fairytale rage) and if it hadn’t been for the promise of the occasional appearance of Sean Bean I probably would’ve turned this off 5 minutes into the Mila toilet scrubbing montage that was the first 20 mins of the film. Really, the only reason I watched it all the way to the end was out of morbid curiosity to see whether or not Sean Bean survived.

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Spoiler alert: he does

Maybe my expectations were just too high and maybe what i saw as being rip offs of superior ideas were just poor homage attempts (a likely story), but maybe Jupiter Ascending just plain sucked. All I know for certain is that Sean Bean definitely did not get enough screen time.

Ye be warned!!

MAJOR NEWS: Doctor Who movie plans revealed!

Whovians, brace yourselves. Julian Asange of Wikileaks has a mighty gift for you today with leaked emails between Sony executives revealing they plan to make a Doctor Who movie within the next 8 years!

BBC head of drama Danny Cohen has said there is “tremendous interest” in making a Doctor Who film, according to leaked emails that have been published on WikiLeaks.

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According to the emails, Doctor Who producers are keen to make a film but feel “hot under the collar” about being pushed to do one soon.

The emails also reveal there is “pressure” from BBC Worldwide (the commercial arm of the corporation) to make a film.

In an email to Sony Pictures Entertainment chief executive Michael Lynton president of international production Andrea Wong said: “Just spoke to Danny Cohen re Dr Who.

“He said that while there has been tremendous interest (and pressure from BBCWW [BBC Worldwide]) to do a Dr Who film, the show runners feel very clear that they don’t want to do one at this moment. 

“That said, over the course of the coming months, the show running team is coming up with an 8 year timeline for the brand  – laying out all that will happen with it. He says that a film will certainly be a part of that timeline.”

After Lynton replied asking whether he “should meet with the showrunner”, Wong said there were no plans to make a Doctor Who movie in the next eighteen months.

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Internal emails between Sony executives were leaked online last year by a group calling itself Guardians of Peace.

The emails have now been publushed on WikiLeaks and founder Julian Assange said that the database includes more than 170,000 emails from Sony Pictures Entertainment and a subsidiary company, as well as 30,000 other documents.

Good news from Midsomer!

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The highly successful and immensely popular crime drama Midsomer Murders has been recommissioned for a further six glorious feature length episodes by ITV.

Filming is already underway for the 18th series, made by Bentley Productions (part of All3Media) and starring Neil Dudgeon as DCI John Barnaby and Gwilym Lee as DS Charlie Nelson, for screening in 2016.

Joining the team this series will be a new pathologist Dr Kam Karimore played by Manjinder Virk (Ordinary Lies, Call the Midwife, The Arbor), who will assist Barnaby and Nelson as they tackle intricate murder mysteries in the beautiful but deadly countryside of Midsomer.

Storylines are rumored to include bodysnatching, competitive cycling and the sighting of UFO’s over Midsomer County.  In other words, it looks like it will be 100% glory.

YBWW: “Hardcore Pawn”

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That’s Pawn with “aw” people. Grow up.

This “reality” show sees pawnbroker Les Gold and his two (obnoxious) children, Seth and Ashley, operate Detroit’s largest pawnshop and it is radioactively bad.

The opening tag “Based on real-life events“, is the real key to understanding this show – it’s really just another way of saying “We made it all up”. “Hardcore Pawn” is about as close to “reality” as “Jerry Springer” was, which is no surprise really given both were produced by Richard Dominick (also responsible for “The Springer Hustle”, “When Jerry Springer ruled the world” and “Jerry Springer: Too hot for tv”)

Unlike “Jerry Springer”, “Hardcore Pawn” is not even good fiction and the shows main tag line “You never know what’s in store” could not be more inaccurate. We always know what’s in store. Every episode is always the same with the 3 obnoxious family members screaming and arguing with each other, while occasionally dealing with angry customers and their frequent threats of violence over the most trivial things which more often than not sees them escorted from the store by security. 

Always the same...

Always the same…

If you’re watching hoping to see interesting artifacts and collectibles, or experts who explain the history of the items, ala “Pawn Stars” – prepare for disappointment. Epic, epic disappointment. But if you’re watching hoping to see a lot of family drama, shouting, finger pointing, how NOT to run a business and lots AND LOTS of security guard/bouncer action then all your Christmas’s have come at once!

Security: The real star of the show…..

Loud, probably scripted, full of improbable events, with completely unlikeable characters and a sense of self-important clueless, Hardcore Pawn is easily one of the worst shows (“reality” or otherwise) that you will ever have the misfortune of seeing. Ye have been warned!

Leonard Nimoy (26 March 1931 – 27 February 2015)

People of Earth,

As I am sure you are all well aware by now, last week we lost one of our most beloved treasures, Mr Leonard Nimoy. There have been so many glorious tributes and eulogies celebrating his life and achievements in the last few days, and it has been so beautiful to see so many fans the world over sending their most heartfelt love and good wishes as Mr Nimoy transitions from this plane to the next. We at Cablagoobla never had the pleasure of meeting Mr Nimoy personally, but his presence in our lives (through the vessel of television) as Mr Spock has had a profound impact on us (like he did on so many others), so it has taken a couple of days for us to come to terms with his passing and compose our own post.

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We were introduced to Leonard Nimoy early on in our lives through our Dads love of Star Trek. I can’t count the amount of times we were subjected to “The Wrath of Khan” as children – it being one of the few VHS tapes we had on hand – and to this day we Cablagooblians can’t vs each other in anything without first quoting “This is like when Spock had to fight Kirk on Star Trek – best friends forced to do battle”. Dun dun dun dun dun dun dun dun…

By the time we were introduced to Star Trek the 90s were in full swing and Mr Nimoy had already appeared as not only Spock, the half-Vulcan, half-human alien hybrid – Considered one of the most popular alien characters EVER portrayed on television and the role he is most remembered for – but as countless other characters on a variety of other shows including The Untouchables, Gunsmoke, Dragnet Mission Impossible and The Man from U.N.C.L.E (just to name a few). He went on to have a successful career both on and off the screen with 12 directorial credits (including two of the Star Trek movies), several books and numerous voice over/narration credits, as well as a number of special appearances to his name.

Nimoy made his directorial debut in 1973, with the “Death on a Barge” segment for an episode of Night Gallery during its final season. (As an interesting side note, Night Gallery was Similar in format to the much more famous “Twilight Zone” series, but whereas the tales in “Twilight Zone” were more science fiction, the tales in Night Gallery have a darker, more horrific edge). Nimoy directed Star Trek III: The Search for Spock in 1984 and Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home in 1986, and also directed the 1987 film Three Men and a Baby.

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Leonard Nimoy directing Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home in 1985

Nimoy authored two volumes of autobiography, I Am Not Spock (1975) and I Am Spock (1995) and also composed several volumes of poetry, some published along with a number of his photographs.

During and following Star Trek, Nimoy also released five albums of musical vocal recordings on Dot Records. On his first album, “Mr. Spock’s Music from Outer Space” and half of his second album “Two sides of Leonard Nimoy, science fiction-themed songs are featured where Nimoy sings as Spock. On his final three albums, he sings popular folk songs of the era and cover versions of popular songs, such as “Proud Mary” and Johnny Cash’s “I Walk the Line”. There are also several songs on the later albums that were written or co-written by Nimoy.

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Leonard Nimoy died February 27, 2015 at the age of 83 from complications of chronic obstructive pulmonary disease (COPD) and is survived by his older brother, Melvin, his ex-wife, Sandi Zober, their two children, (Adam and Julie) as well as six grandchildren and one great-grandchild. May they live long and prosper.

Eurovision 2015 Announcement!

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Australian fans of Eurovision rejoice!

As you may or may not already know this year we have been invited to join the Eurovision party!

(The legit one! Not just the one we all have in our lounge rooms with our high school friend Mr Goon.)

This morning news broke on SBS that Guy Sebastian will be Australias first Eurovision representative. Sporting an outfit consisting entirely of denim (triple points for triple denim) Guy Sebastian said it was a “dream opportunity” and that the event “beats the local RSL” (high praise Guy, high praise)

Word has it that if we win (which seems unlikely but its nice to have a dream…) that we will get to host the event next year in a European city of our choosing.

Paul Clarke, head of Blink TV (the production company behind SBS’s coverage of the event) described Eurovision as “the new Countdown… Some of the acts are daggy, some are brilliant.”

Unlike most of the 27 competing nations, organisers have put Australia straight through to the final of the event, to be held in the Wiener Stadhalle, Vienna on May 23. That means Australia does not have to compete in the semi-finals of the event on May 19 and 21, although we do get to vote in both!